Mummy has a night out tonight! I get to get all dressed up and escape the madhouse for several hours! CANNOT WAIT! Realistically though the following will happen…
I’ll try on every item of clothing I own and decide I have absolutely nothing to wear as I haven’t lost the what I’m still pretending is baby weight but is actually due to the crisps/carbs and wine I now consume these days.
I’ll end up starting to drink wayyyy to early, be pissed by 10 and be thinking about what food I want to get from the takeaway as I avoided tea in an attempt not to look ‘bloated’.
I’ll dance like a lunatic that has just been released way too early on a night out so all the cool 20 somethings will look at me thinking ‘who let her out?!’
I’ll spend all my money at the beginning of the night on watered down cocktails in an attempt to be a cool, sophisticated mum and kick myself later for doing so!
I will wear shoes that are wayyyy too high and stumble about everywhere, whilst walking like a penguin from place to place in an attempt not to fall over!88
At the end of the night, I’ll insist on going to three different takeaways because we all know having a Chinese/pizza and kebab when you get home from a night is the way forward right?!
So bring it on!