Woooohooooo it’s Friday!…. O wait, I have a child! However it’s made me realise that having a toddler is like living with a drunk person 24/7….
1. They are always getting hurt/falling over. Tries to step out the front door, face plants the floor. Then tries to climb steps at the park… yup faceplants again. Runs when they cant even walk properly… Just like Mummy does after one too many shots on a night out in her 5 inch heels. I also swear that when my little one missed a step he looked just like my friend did when she went flying in front of a room full of ‘cool kids’ on our last night out… That look of fear in their eyes as they know they’re going down and there is nothing they can do to stop it! (Brilliant entertainment for the rest of us though .)
2. They constantly spill there drinks, dancing along to cbbcs, drink in hand, just like Mummy dancing along to ‘Shout out to my ex’ on her last night out, wine going everywhere!
3. They cry at anything, fine one minute then absolute crying mess the next…. Same as several girls in the ladies loo at the end of the night.
4. They ‘drunk dial’… We phone the ex on a night out randomly… Kids, it could be anyone from Nanna to 999 when they suddenly grab your mobile phone!
5. They can fall asleep anywhere…The floor, the car, your lap (also anywhere that’s not their actually cot!). Mummy has also woken up in a drunken state on the sofa thinking ‘hang on, what just happened?!’
Oooo how I miss those drunken nights out